Man fleeing cops urinates into wasps’ nest; dogs and personal space: Odds and … – The Oregonian –

To begin, we have a collection of animals being happy. It should make you happy, too, and if it somehow does not, we have a roundup of dogs failing to grasp the concept of “personal space.” If that doesn’t do it for you, we pity you.

You’d kind of want to think that people engaged in illegal activities would have the sense to keep a low profile while engaged in said illegal activities. And you’d be wrong. And we have the proof:

A fellow in North Carolina stole a pharmacy’s drug-filled safe and decided the best way to transport it was to tie it to his car with a rope and drag it for two miles, passing a police car en route. The good news: The cops, apparently not being comatose, did happen to notice this event and arrest the guy.

Meanwhile, in Florida, a guy being chased by the cops decided to dispose of his cocaine by throwing it out the window, apparently believing that the cops wouldn’t notice this maneuver. Then, when officials caught up to him, he employed the staggeringly unsuccessful “I have no idea why handfuls of cocaine are all over my car or how they got there” defense.

Lest you think that it’s only Americans who lack basic training in evasive action, we have the story of the British thief who ran from police, then decided to take a break for public urination — right into a wasps’ nest. Let the record show that a) doing this will indeed catch a cop’s attention; b) wasps do not particularly like having their home urinated upon; c) while it’s true that being arrested is bad and having angry wasps swarm and sting you is worse, it’s very likely that combining these activities is worst of all. Or so the screaming and crying and hospital visit would indicate.

In Spain, police stopped a guy for a routine breathalyzer test and discovered he was sober but was transporting six people who were having sex in the back of the vehicle. Whereupon the cops fined the folks for not wearing seat belts and sent them on their merry way. We’re not real clear on whether this is part of some new European safe sex campaign, if the cop just didn’t want to do extra paperwork or if motorized orgies are legal, so we’re just going to file this under “Europe: Things Are Different There” and move along.

In news that has less disturbing mental imagery, there’s a test tube baby penguin. And there are all kinds of serious scientific reasons for creating her, but we were so busy swooning at the cute (photos! and a video!) that we didn’t really pay much attention to them. Because really, how can you not be 100 percent behind anything that adds more baby penguins to the world? And to wrap up, we have a baby deer getting a belly rub.

Happy weekend! Don’t wet on wasps!

Man fleeing cops urinates into wasps’ nest; dogs and personal space: Odds and … – The Oregonian –
wasps nest – Google News
Google News

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